Monday, April 18, 2011

Oh when it all, all falls down…

 

So no sooner had I spoken about getting back on track, with my new job and all, it is announced the place is closing! Typical really. And while I was initially rather upset about it all, I’m beginning to try see the positive. Which for someone who is naturally pessimistic and slightly cynical like me is a major achievement.

This wasn’t just something that happened out of the blue, it was expected for quite a while but at the same time it happened pretty quickly. At first I was gutted for myself, after all my fears of getting a job, my indecisiveness of whether I wanted to work in the field I studied in college and finally conquering all this, it feels like fate has decided to be cruel to me. This job, while temporary, would give me experience for my CV, build my confidence and allow me to save to go travelling, something I’ve been really wanting to do since sitting my final exam almost a whole year ago (was it really that long?!). Then I felt even worse for everyone else at work, people who have worked there all their lives, people who had bigger problems that me, families, mortgages, real responsibilities.

While it all seems quite bleak, there is some positive. At least I think there is. I was so scared to get a job, the longer time went on without one, the more and more afraid I got. I don’t know why really, I’ve always enjoyed working. I was just really nervous and anxious about everything after I left college. I’ve now proven to myself that I can get a job and be good at it, that it isn’t all that scary. I’ve got loads of practice driving in a city as well, something I had never done before starting this job and something I was just as scared of doing. And yet now I do it every day. And the world isn’t going anywhere, it’ll still be there for me to travel and see for many many years to come. And who knows, I might be there long enough for me to save some money and go travelling after all!

4 comments:

  1. Ah no hun, I'm sorry to hear the place is closing. However, I want to commend you on trying to see the positives in this. Whatever happens you will be absolutely fine.

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  2. Thanks! I've survived thus far right? So I'll keep going, one way or another. No point in being too down on it all really!

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  3. Even though it's a bummer that your workplace is closing (it's always a shock at first and I think anyone would be gutted if they were in your shoes), I am so proud of you for everything you've accomplished :) It's rewarding to challenge yourself and do what you thought you couldn't! Are you going to take a bit of time off or do you some work lined up?

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  4. Aww, thank you Deb!

    Well, I didn't get a whole lot of time off as it is, only one full week and I worked a few days for the other two week. Thursday I start on full time now covering someone until the place shuts, whenever that will be! Seeing as everything is up in the air, not really sure when that will be so nothing else has been lined up just yet

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